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In all games he was a 2/4 before his first attack and generally made it to a 3/5 within three turns at which point he is getting rather serious

Take something like Tune the Narrative

They never enter the battlefield but take effect and are immediately put into their owner's graveyard

The fact that its Blue fits the theme, but it also means youve got access to plenty of spells that will allow you to utilise this to either control the board state, your opponents hands, their library - or basically whatever else you want

Notably, this ability says 'all zombies', meaning if there's another zombie deck at the table, you can activate this ability on that player's turn and forge an undead alliance against the table

So yeah, if counterfeit cards flooded the market, you could play Legacy for free with fake cardson your kitchen table with some friends