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But Raichu provides a 100% guarantee that it'll deal 140 points of damage no matter what

And Lightning Bolt, with that hazy, gloomy, Christopher Rush artwork, is the perfect Beta card

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Turn it face up any time for its mana cost if its a creature card.) Whenever a creature you control but dont own dies, its owner loses 2 life and you gain 2 life

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While it may not deserve to be called the fifth-best Black card in cEDH, I think its close